My friends treat me different

When a friend of mine had his baby, he sat me down and was afraid to tell me he had a child because he did not want me to treat him different. I laughed and was "like why would I treat you different?" Well since having Skyla I know EXACTLY what he was talking about because friends I would not dream in a million years have started to treat me differently.

The Opportunist

* This "friend" has not returned phone calls, facebook, text messages, emails or anything and she would tell people we were sisters. However, when she thought my boyfriend had a job for her she was blowing his phone up. typical. Now I know her true colors.

The Limiters

* Then I have the friends that no longer invite me out saying, "Oh I figured you would not want to go since you have the baby now." Which is fine cause I probably don't want to go anyway. hahahaa. But it is still nice to be invited. Let me make my limits don't put limits on my life.

The Negative Nancys

* Then I have the friends that think I can not do anything but be a "soccer mom." (see definition below) When I would say anything about moving ahead in life or auditioning or anything I would get..."You have no life now you are a mom," "What are you taking headshots for your a Mom," "You can not direct your a mom." WHAT! come on. I am a mom not dead.. The sad part is that these were the same people that told me when I was pregnant that I could do anything and do not to let having a child change my career goals. I think they don't mean any harm just don't know how to talk to me or what to say. So I am telling you, TALK TO ME THE SAME. I still have the same goals and dreams they are just bigger because it is not only about me anymore.

*soccer mom: a women who stays home to nuture and raise their child. Not only do they wash, feed, change and teach the children, they cook, clean, shop for the house, wash clothes, cooks dinner, manage the house, go to doctors appointments, research vaccines, research schools, no longer sleeps peaceful, attends all school functions, go to playgroups, helps with homework, meets with teachers, go to birthday partys and NEVER has a day off. Their job is their child and trust me it is harder and more time consuming then any job you have EVER done.

Just funny to see how people change when you have entered another part of your life. I am VERY proud to be a mom. I love my child with all of my heart. So if you think I am different because I have a child. Your right I AM. I am stronger then I have ever been, I see life being so precious like only a MOM would understand, I want to succeed more then anything so my little girl can have every chance to fulfill her dreams.

Thank you to my friends, family and sorority sisters that have stood by my side. I love you!

Special Shot out to Terrisha! Thank you for being an amazing friend. You have no clue how much you have helped me. I am so proud of you and all of your accomplishments.


Also other shot outs to Tarsha, you make me realize that I am not going crazy and is always there when I need someone to talk to or just laugh with. Adrienne and Chanel, hahhhahaha man yall make me laugh. I love yall more then you know.

And of course my family. Support is our last name!

Smiling Baby!

One of the joys to being a mom is that I get to wake up every morning to a smiling, happy baby. As soon as I say "Good Morning" she starts to laugh. Seeing that smile makes any stresses in life go away.

Mommy and Me!

Today was the first day that I really got out of the house. In about 35 days. And where do I want to go TARGET! I love Target.  I also had to rent a good breast pump. But Target was my big high light.  I know I am still on bedrest but I had to get out for a couple of hours.  

I washed my hair, which thanks to the pre-natal pills looked really good today.  I also put on make-up. Felt good to look nice for the first time in a long time.  

I over did it with my outing today. I stayed on my feet way too long, so close to the end of our journey I was in pain.  So, no more outings (unless the doctors of course) until my bestrest is up. Another 4 weeks. I dont mind I get to spend time with my angel and watch her grow and change in front of my eyes. 

Here are some pictures we took today.

 

I am 30 days old today!

Hello everyone this is baby Skyla Marie.  I am 30 days old today.  I am happy to say that I have been sleeping longer so my mommy can get more sleep. I laughed for the first time on friday June 5th when my mommy kissed my nose. I am crawling a little, I just dont know how to use my arms and legs together. I have a doctors appointment at 2pm to get my first vaccine. My mommy has researched all of my shots and she has chosen which ones are safe for me to get.  

*My day usually starts with me calling my mom for milk. 

*Then she changes my diaper. I like my mom to change me better then my dad because he is very slow.

* I then get to take a bath. I love baths, sometimes I dont even wake up from my sleep.

* I sit in my chair while my mommy eats. 

* We read a book

* Take a walk to the pool, so mommy can get a little bit of walking in. I sleep while she usually calls grandma and checks the mail

* I eat again (I eat a lot..lol)

* Mommy and I take a nap. I do at least. She is usually straightening the house or working on a production project.

* I get a lot of pictures taken of me, I am a super star

* My daddy comes home and plays with me. If the game is on, I will watch it with him.  Go Lakers. 

* Mommy washes me up for bed  (she has to wash off all of the kisses I get through out the day)

* We say our prayer every night  

* While she is getting ready for bed. I watch noggin or listen to music.

* I eat and fall asleep. Mommy slowly puts me in my bed trying not to wake me. I sleep for about 3-4 hours now. 

* Wake up..Eat...Sleep REPEAT.

*  I love my life 

Good Night

Mommy Hood

So many people have asked me..."How does it feel to be a mom?" Well is feels amazing. It has been a little over two weeks and it is the best feeling I have ever had in my life.  I sit and stare at her for hours. I say prayers over and I constantly thank God for giving her to me. Maurice keeps telling me how amazing she is and how he is so happy to raise her with me. This feeling is like nothing I have ever felt before. 

As you all know that I am doing the "40 day bonding" with her. I am sooo happy I decided to do it because I am really getting to know her. Many people have told me that they can watch her while I get a break. I dont want a break. She will never be so small and innocent like this again and I want to cherish every moment. Every little noise, every smile, every cry, when she falls asleep in my arms. To see her big brown eyes staring up at me, I realize that life is so precious and I want to spend all the time I can get with her. I might even extend my 40 days. However, when she is 14 and thinking she is 21 make sure you offer to take her off of my hands then. lol Right now I am enjoying and taking in everything.

My friend Terrisha hit it on the nose when she wrote in my mother's day card. She said, "how does it love at first sight feel?"  This is the ultimate love at first sight. I love Skyla with everything I have. 

Skyla is born!

Skyla Marie was born May 8, 2009 weighing 6 pounds and 15 oz. 20 and a half inches long at 3:09pm.

My delivery story:

Things did not go as planned. My contractions started at 3:36am on Thursday morning 5/7/09. Called Momma Haize (my Doula) after an hour when we realized that they were not stopping. I tried to lay back down and relax but that was not happening. Woke up my mom around 8. She got up fixed gritts and eggs for me. lol Put on some music so I can dance out the pain. Did the stanky leg which both my boyfriend and friends got a big kick out of. Went to the pool. And yes the contractions are still coming 5 mins apart. We stayed at the house til about 6:30 that evening and then I could not take it anymore and we went to the hospital. Only to find out I was only 1cm dilated. What! ahhhhhhh so we decide to stay at the hospital after a hard desision. After some drugs from a hot doctor. I go to sleep and get a little bit of rest. My doctor comes in to see me in the morning. I have now dilated 4cm,

After laying there, and eating ice chips, talking and praying that the baby drops and I would dilate. I get all the way up to 8 and a half cm and stayed there for 3 hours. My doctor comes in to check me and I am now at 7cm. I swelled to the point where now I was going backward. He looked at me and said "you know what we have to do." I cried and cried and was so scared. They prep me for a c-section. Minutes later I was looking at my princess. I am still in a lot of pain. On 8 weeks of light bedrest. But when I look at this little girl I forget for a second the pain I am feeling and I just smile.

In Labor!

Labor pains started at 4am this morning. I am staying at home as long as possible until I have to go to the hospital. Waiting on my Doula. Just ate a plate of grits and eggs cooked by my momma. Not gonna act like it does not hurt because even though the contractions are only lasting 30 seconds right now it is no joke........contraction.........ok that is all I can type write now.

Belly Pics Week 36, 37,39

WEEK 36


WEEK 37


WEEK 39

My Mommy is Here!

My mom arrived April 30th. I was so nervous that Skyla was going to come before she got here. Now the only thing I am nervous about is Maurice being finished his job that he procrastinated on.

Everything is going great. The nursery is almost done and she has more then enough things thanks to all of my amazing friends.

Stay Tuned.

40 Days of Love

As I have been researching facts about being a mother and what is good for my baby. I kept reading about spending 40 days with your baby. I did not fully understand it until one of my yoga teachers brought it up in class. I want to explain it on here since I know a lot of my friends dont understand why I am doing it.

The 40 day bond is spending the first 40 days of your baby's life with very little contact by anyone other then the father of the child.

* Your child is getting to know you and you are getting to know your child.
* The first 40 days are days in which will start to know their habits and to start them on a schedule.
* They only know you so you dont want them to be passed around from person to person.
* The baby's organs such as her heart and lung learnt how to work by mimicking mine work. So I have to have her as close to me as possible as much as I can. This is cutting the chances of SIDS in half.
* They are more susceptible to germs and getting sick.
* We will never get this time back when she is completely pure and innocent and straight from heaven.



When I heard this I thought it was an amazing idea. I have recieved messages from a couple of friends being upset about this, however, I dont care are all. Not to be mean but it is our child and if we want to enjoy her first moments on earth we have every right to it. I am not saying that we would not appreciate your help, but help is not coming over and holding the baby while I clean the house. However, we would appreciate a meal being dropped off or offering to go to the market, or just a sweet email.

So take this as us being protective but just wanted to really enjoy our new baby.

Thanks a bunch!

Pre-Natal Yoga at Golden Bridge

I have been going to a Yoga Studio called Golden Bridge Yoga and this place is amazing. It is not your LA type of Yoga it is real meditation and spiritual healing yoga. We sing to our babies and do stretches to massage our babies and to help us in labor. Not only do we do Yoga they actually care about you as a person. They ask about how you are feeling mentally. I feel so calm when I leave there. They have a full cafe with all vegan food, also a coffee and sweet parts, along with tons of books, cd's, oils and clothing, There is also a wellness center where they have all different kinds of massages and healing services. The place is not just for pre-natal, they have all different types of yoga and meditation classes. I highly recommend everyone go there to clear their head, you will learn a lot about your self.

www.goldenbridgeyoga.com

My NEW Car!

I got a letter from Ford telling me about their buy back plan. So Maurice and I decided to see that they had to offer. After being their for about 5 hours, and Maurice missing his Laker game, I drove home with a brand new fully loaded limited edition Ford Escape. I miss my Mustang but I do love my new car. The mustang will be back....it will be back!

Love!

I would like to say that is feels good to be in LOVE. When I moved here to Los Angeles from Maryland I never thought I would ever meet anyone that I would fall this hard for. I had the worst dates ever. Some to the point where I thought I was being punked. I just knew that I would forever be single because LA guys are soooo wack.

These are some issues that me and my girl friends have faced dating "LA MEN":
*They can not DRESS at all
* No Swagger
* usually no job
* more into themselves then anything
* does not pay for a date
* does not open doors
* pony tails
* no confidence
* no college
* dont want to settle down
* young minded
* no goals
* club hoppers and they are grown men
* Most dont know that they are gay
* Or know they are gay but still trying to play the straight roll
* Never left the west coast even to visit
* wear winter clothes in the spring (now that is for the girls too)


There is so much more but I need to stop so I dont hurt the feelings of my LA male friends that read my blog. Sorry yall but yall know I am right on this one. And yes my man is from LA but has the swagger of someone from the east coast and he is the FIRST and ONLY LA man I met out here that has east coast swagger.

Maurice and I are exciting for our baby. I fall harder and harder for him everyday. I never thought I would ever feel like this for anyone. Of course like any relationship we have our ups and downs but through it all he is my rock and the one I plan to spend the rest of my life with. I love you baby! (dont f*c* up now that I have pumped you up lol)

My Easter

I had a great Easter. I went to church with Deven (my soon to be step son). After church I came home and took a nap, while he played on the Playstation. Then after him and Maurice played a few games we all got dressed to go to our friend Chris and Bryan's house for a Easter BBQ and Egg hunt. It was great. Deven left with tons of Easter candy and tired and dirty from playing with their bad ass dog Miles. He was sleep as soon as he got into the car.

Close friends and food, who could ask for anything more.

11th Doc App

So today I go to the doctor and it started out the same. 4/14/09

Get weighed: 138 pounds
Pee in a Cup
Blood Pressure: Normal
Measure my tummy
Hear the baby's heart beat: Perfectly healthy and normal (Deven my soon to be step son got to hear it today for the first time)

Then the doctor comes in and asks the normal questions:

How are you feeling? Fine
Is she moving a lot? Yes, a whole lot
Have you been stretching and walking? everyday (I have been shopping a lot so I am getting a lot of the walking done)

Then he puts on the rubber gloves and sticks his finger inside me to check to see if I started dilating yet. This hurts me like crazy and it should not. So now he has a puzzled look on his face and his concerned why this is hurting me so bad. Then he goes out the room and grab a long thin stick to get a test from deep inside. This did not feel great either by the way.

So now I am a little worried. My doctor does not know why I am in so much pain and either do I? I'll keep ya posted on what happens.

Say many prayers that I have a quick, safe and painless birth.

Happy Easter!

Week 35 Belly Pic!

I am posting a week 35 belly picture. This was taken before the High Society Shower but I am slow at getting pictures up.


This was after prenatal yoga that is why I look a mess.

Things are going well with me. It is getting harder to move around. Bending over and getting up from chairs are annoying. She is still moving like crazy unlike what all of the books say. (they say that at this point she will not have that much room to move, however I have a dancer inside of me and she is dancing up a storm) I have little pains here and there but only when it is time to go to the bathroom or when I have walked too much. I am trying to rest a lot more. Maurice has been very good at helping me out and making me rest. Yes he has to make me because I am such a busy body.

Baby Showers! Part 2

These are pictures from the "High Society" Theme shower (big hats, dresses and pearls.). This was filled will mostly my lovely sorority sister of Alpha Kappa Alpha and the fly Mocha Moms.

Baby Showers! Part 1

First I would like to thank my amazing friends Tarsha, Derrick, Adrienne and Quiana for throwing me not one but two baby showers. I was blessed with 70-75 guests that came to shower me with love and gifts.

This week I took time to return lots of gifts. lol Not because I did not like them but because I received lots of duplicate gifts. Many guests did not check their gift off of the registry, but that is ok because it went to a credit on my gift cards.

Many friends are asking what do I need or what can they get me since they did not make the shower. I only really need gift cards because I have to buy a couple of big ticket items. Sorry if that does not seem cool like I was told by one of my friends but unless you want to buy the $200 walker, $300 stroller, $200 baby monitor, $200 Pack and Play, or $150 crib sheet set then be my guest. But since it is a recession I would gladly take a gift card from Baby R Us/Toys r Us or Target. (most of those items are at Babies r Us/Toys R Us)











The first shower was co-ed and the second was mainly sorority sisters and mocha moms.

Doc App 9 & 10

As you see I am playing catch up. lol I have been soooo busy with getting the showers together and moving that I forget to update my blog. Well everything is going well with me. The baby is growing at the pace she should be growing at. I currently weigh 136 pounds as of today April 6th.

UPDATES:
*I am currently going to pre-natal yoga to relax and get ready for the big day.
*We have moved and unpacked into our new spot, which we both love
*Still getting the last touches for the nursery and for Skyla's arrival. (I can not believe I have a nursery)

So far so good. Tomorrow's entry will be pictures from the baby showers.

Keep us in your prayers for a fast and safe delivery.

I Found the car I would like to have.

After looking at different cars and finding out that my car is very unsafe for my child to ride in because their is no middle seat so if God forbid I have someone in the passenger seat and if I have an accident their seat could smash the car seat. Also I took a mocha mom and her child home with a car seat and her seat had to be pulled all the way forward and the seat back had to be a little forward, which was super uncomfortable. Her knees were touching my dash and she is a small women. So that was all I needed to see to know I need a new car.

So I went car shopping with my friend Terrisha and I looked at a lot of SUV's since I thought I did not like a car that was not a convertible. And I refuse to get a soccer mom car. She suggested tons of cars, I was so surprised that she knew so much about cars.

So I found the car that I want but we will see if I can actually get it. It is the LEXUS GS. It is too cute. It is an adult car. I would not look like I am fresh off of the plane from Maryland and had to get a LA convertible. And it comes with a lot of bells and whistles standard. Check out the picture. This is the color I want too.  

We found a new place! Dare to be Domestic I need you!

I am soooo happy. We are no longer looking for an apartment. We found a three bedroom/two bath in Woodland Hills where we live now which has one of the best school systems in California. Which is important because Deven (Maurice's 10 year old son will be moving in with us starting July).

The apartment building is large (a little too large for my liking but it is way cheaper then where we live now. I will miss my stainless steel appliances, bay doors, my bathroom, office, mountain view and 350 extra square feet. wow that is a lot. lol But we are gaining a baby room which I can not wait to get with DARE TO BE DOMESTIC and get it done. An amazing gym and pool.


We move in April 1st. So who ever is down to help we really need it since I can not lift anything.

Doctor's Appointment #8

On St. Patty day AKA Lucky's Holiday (since I am a leprechaun). I went to see my new doctor. That is actually treating me like I should be treated. Found out that I should not even have been paying a co-pay because of my insurance, my old doctor was treating me like I had an HMO.

Everything is going great with me and the baby. I weight 133 which is just one pound up from last week. He told me to get back into dance classes which made me smile since I am going crazy. I also start pre-natal yoga on friday.

Things are going well, no complaints.

Professional Pregnancy Pictures Week 31 of pregnancy

One of my good friends Karen offered to shoot me and Maurice as her gift to us for the baby.  This was a big deal because she is amazing photographer and just getting an appointment with her is hard.  Her specialty are Lifestyle photos but she does everything. We had the best time with her and I would recommend her if you need headshots, baby pictures, wedding pictures...anything. She is GOOD!  She will give you a discount if you say that I sent you, so feel free to drop my name. www.karenchristensenphotos.com

Here are a few of the pictures she took of us. Some need to be touched up so I will post them later. So these pictures are all raw. And you will see NO stretch marks.....lets hope that stays.

New Doctor!

All I have to say is "I love my new doctor." He is amazing. Yes I said "he" because I was really against having a male doctor but he is funny and focused on how I was doing and getting to know me, which was a big change since the doc I had was quick and distant.  He has a Irish accent which makes things funny because of how he says things. 

Maurice and I sat in his office and just talked. I also meet with him next week just so we can talk and get to know each other. Finally. 

Also he said that I should be working out unlike the other doctors orders. The scary thing is that he did an exam that showed I have a small pelvis area which might mean C-section which I DONT want. So he told me exercises to do to help that.  And told me to have lots of sex but that was a joke, he said the sex will not hurt nor help it. lol 

So I am a happy girl! Weighing in at a big 132 pounds. Check in tomorrow for my professional pregnancy pictures. 

Things are looking up!

First I would like to thank everyone for their phone calls and emails finding out if I am ok.  It feels good to know that I have great friends and support.

Now for the update.

Baby: Since I was put on the light bed rest Skyla has grown almost double in two weeks. She is exactly where she needs to be. She is VERY active. At any time of the day you can see my stomach jumping around. She is definitely a dancer or as my Best Freak Friends call her, "Baby Beat Freak."

Doctor: I left my doctor's office and is now with a doctor with a private practice.  He came highly recommended from my dula (kinda like a mid wife/birthing coach) .  The funny thing is that I was the 2nd girl to come to them from my old doctor. I meet with him for the first time on Tuesday March 10th.

Money: Ugh

Me: I feel great. Sleeping is VERY hard.  Since I am told to sleep on my left, I can only start off on my right and then move to my left. Peeing has gotten more frequent, and don't make me laugh cause I am liable to pee on myself.   

Home: Maurice and I are doing very well. He loves to talk to my stomach and tell Skyla to kick me lol.  She reacts to his voice and touch every time.  He is working hard on trying to get things in place for her arrival. We have also decided to move.  I found a cute apt today that I really like, dont like the location but I love the inside so we will see.  Showing Maurice tomorrow.

Bad Doctors Experience Part 2

Before I went to see the doctor I collect myself. Dry my eyes and try to compose myself.  I go up to see his doctor. (Ironically my doctor and his doctor have the same exact room number and floor.)  I am telling the ladies at the desk who I was refered by and what my problem was at my doctors office. Then I go into saying that I have only heard amazing things about Dr. S (his doctor) and I would love to transfer over to this office. So they are both saying what a great doctor he is and so it this guy standing behind them.  

They ask what insurance I had I am I feel like I am pitching a movie idea. I am telling them that I am healthy and I have no problems and I just want a doctor to take care of me and my baby. I am now shaking and my eyes are starting to water because I can feel the way this is going. They said Dr. S does not take any tranfer patients. I start to beg because I have nothing. I have never felt so helpless. They ask how far along I was and I say that I am 7 months. Still pitching myself at any chance I can get.  Then the guy behind them that was also involved in the convo says "I would not be able to deliver you anyway I will be on vacation." I says, "You are the doctor that we have been talking about all of this time." I breakdown. I feel that everyone is taking me as a joke. I have a freaking life inside of me and you want to play games.

I leave out the room crying harder then ever.  I had to sit on the side of the building because I could not walk I was so upset at how my day was going. I finally get through to Maurice and I could not stop crying he is getting scared because he does not know why I am crying but he does know I had to go to the doctors. He calms me down. And I sit and think of what is my next step. 

Currently I am stilling trying to get understanding of what is going on at my doctors office because I am 7 months no one new will take me as of now but I am still looking.