My friends treat me different

When a friend of mine had his baby, he sat me down and was afraid to tell me he had a child because he did not want me to treat him different. I laughed and was "like why would I treat you different?" Well since having Skyla I know EXACTLY what he was talking about because friends I would not dream in a million years have started to treat me differently.

The Opportunist

* This "friend" has not returned phone calls, facebook, text messages, emails or anything and she would tell people we were sisters. However, when she thought my boyfriend had a job for her she was blowing his phone up. typical. Now I know her true colors.

The Limiters

* Then I have the friends that no longer invite me out saying, "Oh I figured you would not want to go since you have the baby now." Which is fine cause I probably don't want to go anyway. hahahaa. But it is still nice to be invited. Let me make my limits don't put limits on my life.

The Negative Nancys

* Then I have the friends that think I can not do anything but be a "soccer mom." (see definition below) When I would say anything about moving ahead in life or auditioning or anything I would get..."You have no life now you are a mom," "What are you taking headshots for your a Mom," "You can not direct your a mom." WHAT! come on. I am a mom not dead.. The sad part is that these were the same people that told me when I was pregnant that I could do anything and do not to let having a child change my career goals. I think they don't mean any harm just don't know how to talk to me or what to say. So I am telling you, TALK TO ME THE SAME. I still have the same goals and dreams they are just bigger because it is not only about me anymore.

*soccer mom: a women who stays home to nuture and raise their child. Not only do they wash, feed, change and teach the children, they cook, clean, shop for the house, wash clothes, cooks dinner, manage the house, go to doctors appointments, research vaccines, research schools, no longer sleeps peaceful, attends all school functions, go to playgroups, helps with homework, meets with teachers, go to birthday partys and NEVER has a day off. Their job is their child and trust me it is harder and more time consuming then any job you have EVER done.

Just funny to see how people change when you have entered another part of your life. I am VERY proud to be a mom. I love my child with all of my heart. So if you think I am different because I have a child. Your right I AM. I am stronger then I have ever been, I see life being so precious like only a MOM would understand, I want to succeed more then anything so my little girl can have every chance to fulfill her dreams.

Thank you to my friends, family and sorority sisters that have stood by my side. I love you!

Special Shot out to Terrisha! Thank you for being an amazing friend. You have no clue how much you have helped me. I am so proud of you and all of your accomplishments.


Also other shot outs to Tarsha, you make me realize that I am not going crazy and is always there when I need someone to talk to or just laugh with. Adrienne and Chanel, hahhhahaha man yall make me laugh. I love yall more then you know.

And of course my family. Support is our last name!

Smiling Baby!

One of the joys to being a mom is that I get to wake up every morning to a smiling, happy baby. As soon as I say "Good Morning" she starts to laugh. Seeing that smile makes any stresses in life go away.

Mommy and Me!

Today was the first day that I really got out of the house. In about 35 days. And where do I want to go TARGET! I love Target.  I also had to rent a good breast pump. But Target was my big high light.  I know I am still on bedrest but I had to get out for a couple of hours.  

I washed my hair, which thanks to the pre-natal pills looked really good today.  I also put on make-up. Felt good to look nice for the first time in a long time.  

I over did it with my outing today. I stayed on my feet way too long, so close to the end of our journey I was in pain.  So, no more outings (unless the doctors of course) until my bestrest is up. Another 4 weeks. I dont mind I get to spend time with my angel and watch her grow and change in front of my eyes. 

Here are some pictures we took today.

 

I am 30 days old today!

Hello everyone this is baby Skyla Marie.  I am 30 days old today.  I am happy to say that I have been sleeping longer so my mommy can get more sleep. I laughed for the first time on friday June 5th when my mommy kissed my nose. I am crawling a little, I just dont know how to use my arms and legs together. I have a doctors appointment at 2pm to get my first vaccine. My mommy has researched all of my shots and she has chosen which ones are safe for me to get.  

*My day usually starts with me calling my mom for milk. 

*Then she changes my diaper. I like my mom to change me better then my dad because he is very slow.

* I then get to take a bath. I love baths, sometimes I dont even wake up from my sleep.

* I sit in my chair while my mommy eats. 

* We read a book

* Take a walk to the pool, so mommy can get a little bit of walking in. I sleep while she usually calls grandma and checks the mail

* I eat again (I eat a lot..lol)

* Mommy and I take a nap. I do at least. She is usually straightening the house or working on a production project.

* I get a lot of pictures taken of me, I am a super star

* My daddy comes home and plays with me. If the game is on, I will watch it with him.  Go Lakers. 

* Mommy washes me up for bed  (she has to wash off all of the kisses I get through out the day)

* We say our prayer every night  

* While she is getting ready for bed. I watch noggin or listen to music.

* I eat and fall asleep. Mommy slowly puts me in my bed trying not to wake me. I sleep for about 3-4 hours now. 

* Wake up..Eat...Sleep REPEAT.

*  I love my life 

Good Night

Mommy Hood

So many people have asked me..."How does it feel to be a mom?" Well is feels amazing. It has been a little over two weeks and it is the best feeling I have ever had in my life.  I sit and stare at her for hours. I say prayers over and I constantly thank God for giving her to me. Maurice keeps telling me how amazing she is and how he is so happy to raise her with me. This feeling is like nothing I have ever felt before. 

As you all know that I am doing the "40 day bonding" with her. I am sooo happy I decided to do it because I am really getting to know her. Many people have told me that they can watch her while I get a break. I dont want a break. She will never be so small and innocent like this again and I want to cherish every moment. Every little noise, every smile, every cry, when she falls asleep in my arms. To see her big brown eyes staring up at me, I realize that life is so precious and I want to spend all the time I can get with her. I might even extend my 40 days. However, when she is 14 and thinking she is 21 make sure you offer to take her off of my hands then. lol Right now I am enjoying and taking in everything.

My friend Terrisha hit it on the nose when she wrote in my mother's day card. She said, "how does it love at first sight feel?"  This is the ultimate love at first sight. I love Skyla with everything I have. 

Skyla is born!

Skyla Marie was born May 8, 2009 weighing 6 pounds and 15 oz. 20 and a half inches long at 3:09pm.

My delivery story:

Things did not go as planned. My contractions started at 3:36am on Thursday morning 5/7/09. Called Momma Haize (my Doula) after an hour when we realized that they were not stopping. I tried to lay back down and relax but that was not happening. Woke up my mom around 8. She got up fixed gritts and eggs for me. lol Put on some music so I can dance out the pain. Did the stanky leg which both my boyfriend and friends got a big kick out of. Went to the pool. And yes the contractions are still coming 5 mins apart. We stayed at the house til about 6:30 that evening and then I could not take it anymore and we went to the hospital. Only to find out I was only 1cm dilated. What! ahhhhhhh so we decide to stay at the hospital after a hard desision. After some drugs from a hot doctor. I go to sleep and get a little bit of rest. My doctor comes in to see me in the morning. I have now dilated 4cm,

After laying there, and eating ice chips, talking and praying that the baby drops and I would dilate. I get all the way up to 8 and a half cm and stayed there for 3 hours. My doctor comes in to check me and I am now at 7cm. I swelled to the point where now I was going backward. He looked at me and said "you know what we have to do." I cried and cried and was so scared. They prep me for a c-section. Minutes later I was looking at my princess. I am still in a lot of pain. On 8 weeks of light bedrest. But when I look at this little girl I forget for a second the pain I am feeling and I just smile.

In Labor!

Labor pains started at 4am this morning. I am staying at home as long as possible until I have to go to the hospital. Waiting on my Doula. Just ate a plate of grits and eggs cooked by my momma. Not gonna act like it does not hurt because even though the contractions are only lasting 30 seconds right now it is no joke........contraction.........ok that is all I can type write now.